Lessons from Lyz

As a dad, there are times when your children teach you life lessons.  They don't do it on purpose, they just live life.  If you are humble enough, you learn.  Of coarse it does require that we as dads take time out of our day to watch and just be with our little teachers.

Alyzabeth is my oldest girl, and at 14, she isn't quite "little" anymore.  Laura and I had her when we were young and figuring out life ourselves.  Not that I have this whole dad thing figured out yet, but with Lyz everything was new.  I had a lot of learning opportunities.  We have grown up together and try to keep learning.  She is a great girl and shares a lot of the same interests as her dad.  We both love going to baseball games, playing basketball and any other sport going on at the time.

For anyone familiar with the Compton family, we play to win.  We almost suck the fun out of playing we want to win so bad.  Lyz is following in her grandpa, dad, aunt, dad's cousins' (Scotty) footsteps.  We knew early she was going to have the Compton competitive gene.  When she was three, she made sure she counted every memory card to know she beat her mom and I in the game of remembering.  She still has that competitive spirit.  She does not like the idea that her younger sister has the potential to be taller.

Her love for sports also proves she is a true Compton.  She has done everything from gymnastics, to soccer, to softball, to her new found love, basketball.  This love for sports added to the desire to win can be a dangerous combination.  Believe me, I know.  I have lived it myself.  I only wish I handled it with as much class and grace as Lyz.  More on that later.

Lyz has taught me a lot through the years when it comes to sports.  Her lessons so far have come in the form of questions.  Why are you yelling at the TV?  Does them losing really ruin your day?  What are bragging rights, and why do you need them?  I am still working through those questions.....and I do enjoy bragging rights!!!

This year was one of the biggest lessons I learned.  This year, Lyz's lesson came from watching her in action.  Lyz entered high school this year, and November brought us our first taste of high school basketball.  In all my Comptonness, I was excited.  First of all, the team looked really good.  They had only lost 4 games in two years and were set up for another good run.  Second, high school ball is about winning.  It is OK to root to win.  Up until this point, it was about learning the game (although I still wanted to win).  Now I could cheer and root to win and not embarrass the family.

Lyz worked hard over the summer to improve her game and quickly became an important piece to the early success of the team.  This was going to be a good year.  I gave her the dad speech of making sure she played with good sportsmanship, gave her best, was a good teammate, and made sure she was a testimony on the hardwood.  I should have listened to my own advice.  I mean well, but there is something about a man in stripes that gets me going.  I can't let a bad call go, and in my opinion, most of the calls are bad.  If anyone has watched a game with a Compton male, you know what I mean.

Half way through the season, the team lost one of their best players.  She got placed on another team due to injury, and I was bummed.  The team was playing great, and I wanted it to stay that way.  The team struggled to figure out their roles in the the games that followed, and the parents, me especially,  were growing increasingly frustrated.  Why would the AD pull our team apart?  The girls can not get over this hurdle!!  This ruined our season!

Lyz didn't say a word.

Lyz worked harder to be a leader, and to encourage her team.  When she lost, she lost with grace, while her dad vented his frustration to the other dads.  When she won, she did it with humility and encouraged her team.  When calls didn't go her way, she picked herself up off the floor and ran to the other end while I stood with my arms in the air demanding an explanation (I used my best bad ref material, too).

Lyz never gave up.  She didn't complain, or groan about how the team didn't get a fair shake.  She didn't even mention the fact the team lost their starting point guard.  She worked hard to get better.  She stayed later to improve her shot, and lifted to get stronger.  She used this challenge to better herself and the team.  While parents pleaded for better calls, she and the team played on.  They finished strong with a 4 game winning streak and looked like they didn't miss a beat.  There is a saying that sports don't build character, they reveal it.  The character of Lyz, and her team (Lyndsey, Autumn, Beckett, Sparty, and Kendra) stood out.  Well done, Wildcats.

I thought a lot about Lyz last night and about how much character she revealed this season.  Lyz lived Philippians 3:14 this season.  She pressed on on toward the goal, and did not let anyone get her down.  Every time a roadblock was thrown #33's way, she pressed on.

Now basketball is just a game, but the lesson Lyz taught me this season wasn't just about basketball.  God doesn't promise us an easy life.  He doesn't promise everything will set up and go according to our plan.  We could lose a key person at work that requires more of us.  We will catch bad breaks and want to throw our hands up and give in.
God does require us to press on.  And if we do...He does promise a winning streak when we reach the end.    

Dancing Shoes

February is yet another month of fun when you live in a house full of girls.  February fun is kicked off with the annual Daddy Daughter Dance held at the middle school.  Dads get dressed up in their best, daughters put on their fanciest dress, and it is off for a night of dinner and dancing.  Most years the dance consists of all the dads standing along the wall, where are girls instructed us to be, while the daughters run around with their friends and play with the balloons in the gym.  I would get the occasional nod to put my left arm in and shake it all about only if the song called for it.  After convincing, OK begging, I can get in a slow dance as the DJ is wrapping up the evening.

However, my first ever dance didn't even make it to the Hokey Pokey.  I was in my wool pants and tie, Lyz was in her red turtleneck and black dress pants.  I had my pink ticket in hand and was excited for a special night filled with fun dancing and the Hallmark sentimental slow dance.  After ten minutes, Lyz came over to me, I was in my assigned bleacher spot, and said "I want to go bowling."  Really?  Bowling in this?  That's what she wanted, and it was her night.  We had a blast together with her best friend at the bowling alley.  And while I did not get that slow dance, it is a night I will not forget.

We did manage to make it through the entire dance in the following years, but the protocol stayed the same.  I waited along the bleachers with all the other dads eagerly waiting for our girls to throw us the "come out and dance with me" bone.   We didn't get picked much, but when we did, we felt like a million bucks.

Lyz and Kenzie have out grown their dancing shoes, and are no longer interested in the dance.  I imagine my next dance with them will be when they are in their wedding shoes.

This year was Maddy's turn.  She has gone to the dance with me before, but this year it was different.  This year it was just her and me.  This year she had my undivided attention.  This year she didn't have to share me with her sisters.....and what a time we had.  I placed the corsage on her wrist, and we headed off to dinner.  After dinner, we headed to the dance with the pink ticket in hand and a starry eyed girl on my arm.  I was heading to my annual spot with the dads when I heard the best sentence of the year...."Dad, aren't we going to dance?"  I winked at the lonely bleacher dads (an I got the call up wink), and danced the night away.  We made up dance moves, laughed at each other, shook it all about, did the chicken.....and then the music slowed.  Maddy nestled in and we swayed back and forth.  I didn't want the night to end.  If you are a dad, and have never taken your daughter on a date, find the time.  Nothing will make your little girl feel more important than her dad spending time with just her.  She gets the message that she is worth you spending your time and money on just her.  To be frank, I couldn't think of a better investment, but I digress.

February fun is continued on 2/14.  I live with 6 girls, so I have to plan for 2/14 a couple of weeks in advance.  Now I get it that Valentines Day is just a Hallmark Holiday, but I DON'T CARE.  People tell me "I don't need a day to tell my girl I love her".  I don't either, but this day is a chance for me to do it out loud.  It is a day for me to show my girls I love them like crazy.  It is also a chance for me to show all the guys in their school..."It's OK, the Compton girls have a Valentine!!"  My day starts with the tour of the schools where I drop off to each daughter a red rose, balloon, and their favorite candy.  The greatest part about this is they never out grow it.  Even this year, Lyz came through the high school hall way with a look of excitement and gave me a big hug.  Her younger sisters followed suit all giving me an excited "You came again" hug.  I love those.  The night concludes with me making them all a dinner.  I make sure to place their candy, they have all grown to appreciate the gourmet chocolates, on their plates so they can sneak a quick sweet before dinner.  I must add that their mom has the biggest vase and box at her dinner seat.  Dinner together is always a blast, and Valentines Day would not seem right without it.  We had another great February 14, and I felt again like the luckiest man on earth.  How many people can say they have 6 valentines??

As I think more about it, Valentines Day is just another way for me to show my family the example of how our Heavenly Father loves us.  No matter how old my girls get, or how far they move away, they will always be my Valentine.  They will always receive flowers from their very first Valentine.  God loves us the same way.  No matter what stage in life we are in, or how far we try and run, God will always love us in a way we can not fathom.  He is waiting and eager to shower us with blessings.  All we need to do is call him off the bleachers and invite him to dance.

Busy Dad

My life has become quite busy.  Don't get me wrong, I am not complaining.  This is the fun busy.  The kind of busy most people choose not to experience.  To be quite honest, I am the kind of busy people try to avoid today, and think I am crazy for embracing it.  The busy I am talking about is BIG family busy.  I am the proud daddy of five, yes five, beautiful girls.  I know what you are thinking, and I have heard it all.  "That is a lot of weddings", or "Think of all the boys coming around", and my personal favorite "I feel sorry for you when their cycles all synchronize".

I embrace it all.  I love the fact that I get to protect five precious hearts until God provides the right man to take over.  Staring across the table at a bright eyed little girl, or young lady, on daddy daughter date night is hard to beat.  Morning cuddles on the couch watching Dora, are times I cherish.

I must admit, I did not envision a house full of girls when I thought about being a dad.  I saw mostly boys.  I couldn't wait to play ball, go to games, play catch, and fill out brackets every March.  The cool thing is I still get to do all that with my girls, and experience the blessing of a daughters love times 5.....and they clean up a lot better to boot!

We are busy.  We are at Lyz's games on Tuesday and Thursdays, Kenzies games on Monday and Wednesdays, Varsity games on Friday, Youth group and AWANA on Wednesdays, Church on Sunday, which leaves Saturday.  Half the year they are consumed with Soccer games and taxiing everyone around to their social endeavors.

As you can imagine, the shoes pile up as we come and go.  As I was putting them away the other day, I got to thinking that the shoes in my life are getting bigger.  The thing about being busy, is I don't take enough time to think about what we are doing as we go through life as a family of seven.  It was just yesterday, I was velcroing on Lyz's baby Jordans.  Today I was putting away the size nine basketball shoes.  With each size comes challenges, changes, and a lot of fun memories.  I am going to take more time to enjoy life in each size.  Feel free to hop on the ride and laugh at my mistakes and celebrate the joy of having girls.  Too soon the only size left will be mine....